In case you haven’t noticed, I changed the theme and layout of the blog. I feel like this is a little bit easier to read and it looks a bit more mature.
I want you all to know that I will be doing a better job of updating this thing! I know that I’ve been slacking but I’m going to change that. The title of this post is perfect for what I want to say because there have been a lot of changes in my life lately and I plan on sharing them all with you.
As you know, I turned 25 a little over a month ago and I continue to reflect on my past and re-evaluate who I want to be in the future. I want to travel more, I want to volunteer on a weekly basis, I want to make a difference in my community by giving back, I want to project love and acceptance to everyone I meet. I thought that the only way I could do this, would be to go to school and get a degree. I thought this was my only option at success because of what was shoved down my throat as a child/teenager. We as a society put way too much pressure on our youth to get a college education when that doesn’t necessarily mean a job will be there in the field that you studied. I have family members and friends who got a college degree only to turn around and get a job that is 100% completely different. I don’t want that for myself or for my children. So because of this, I will not be going back to school. School and I have never gotten along. Don’t get me wrong, I love learning; I just love to do it on my own terms and on my own time! I don’t want to continue spending thousands of dollars a year on schooling when I’m not completely sure what I truly want to be when I grow up.
When I look 5, 10, or even 15 years into the future, the Jessica I see is a “Stay-at-home mom”. She’s helping her (hopefully) husband run his mechanic shop. She’s volunteering at her local homeless shelters and youth outreach programs. When I picture myself there, I’m happy and excited for it. This is how I know that that is the right path for me right now. My goals and dreams are still there, but they are ever changing and probably will be for the rest of my life. I’ve always been the type of woman who couldn’t make up her mind. I like having options and choices, and I like being able to change my mind on a moment’s notice.
There are a few people in my life that I worry I’m letting down with my decision but I have to keep telling myself that this is my life, not theirs. I’m the one making the tuition payment, not them. I am the one who has to wake up and feel happy every day with my own personal choices. I’m sending out a request to you all; when you see me trying to justify myself to others, please make me stop! I’m tired of trying to make others happy and putting myself on the back burner, and I need to focus on myself and my health first.
For those of you who are worried or interested in my current weight loss situation: I’m not going to lie, I’ve been slacking there too! I joined this group on social media called “The Fit Girls” and they have their own ‘guide’ that has a breakdown of the food you eat everyday and the exercises you do daily. They have a 28 day starter program that I’m starting on September 14th so I will be updating more often once that starts. I’ve seen the progress pictures of the women who have gone through the 28 day program and I’m pretty impressed! I don’t know if it will be something that I continue for the rest of my life, but it’s a kick start that I need. I know that I said that about the boot camp I joined but I don’t think that I had hit rock bottom at that point. I feel like I’ve hit it and I’m ready to have a new, healthy relationship with food and exercise. I know that once I start to get more active and eat the right foods at the right time, other things in my life that haven’t been right will start to improve.
Thank you all for reading and showing support for my choices. I will post again soon, promise.